Beautiful Choas Journey. Step #2..

I cannot do this. And I certainly cannot do this without trusting in my Wonderful Loving Awesome God.

I feel like the Little Engine that Could, but going in reverse.

I am so dissappointed, in myself, in my grades, in my realtionships, in my friends, in my speech, in my actions.

All together dissappointed.

And this is NOT a good feeling. Not at all.

So how do I change this, how do I become proud in myself again, how do I make my parents proud again, how do I show others the love of my Heavenly Father?

I TRUST.

Not only trust, but RELY on God.

He must be my comfort, my peace, my friend, my Provider.

He must be my all.

Not my "when things are going wrong" but my ALL.

All the time.

He can't be my second choice, I have to desire Him as much as he desires me.

Which is impossible but a good goal to have.

His love, the love I want to show people, is so awesome and beautiful.

It is unreal. I cant imagine the things I could do to try and get others to experience this love.

But Ive got to try.

Ive got to reorder my life to reflect my Beautiful Lord.

And to do this I must let go of my troubles and my past.

My problems, I must identify my wrongs and right them.

And this is the next step in a life of beautiful choas.

Setting the goal, and trying with every ounce to reach that goal.

That is all I can do.

The rest...

is God.

SO I will praise Him, good, bad, or ugly.

Hold me to that!

Gods Love&Rockets

Aggie