My life as a Teenage Robot..

Jerimiah 29:11 <3

Over the last few days I have fallen into the routine of a teenage robot, of a regular teen.  Which I am not.

I have so much to look forward to, so much to do.

And I know this, very well infact but lately, Ive become wrapped up in boys.

I know I know, youre thinking "What a typical teenage girl."

And I would have to agree..My life has veered away from my relationship with God, my future, my education, my extra curiculars and my happiness'And it has become about boys,dating,boys, and boys.

I am ashamed to admit that.

And never ever did I think I would have to say that.

And now that we've broken up, Im crushed.

My heart aches when I see him, and especially when I see him with her. And when he smiles. I mean how can he be so happy when Im dying inside?!

This is my life, my internal battle.

This is why I wish I would have never made that wrong turn.

This pain, this hurt, this anger. All of that would have been gone if I would have listened, to everybody, to God, to myself..

But I didnt. I took impulsive chance. I made a snap decision. And that decision caused me my happiness.

Even in this trivial little highschool realtionship, it hurt me.

Because I wasnt enough.

So my prayer for myself.

That I look to delight in the Lord, that I find my happiness, my love, my passion in Him.

Not in some human boy.

Because if I look to be satisfied with a human, I will be dissappointed, always.

I want to be soo in love with God that I dont even notice boys.

And I want relief, from this pain, from this sickness.

I want God again.

I want to stop failing in life, to realize what is important.

"Your love is extravagant
Your friendship, it is intimate
I feel like moving to the rhythm of Your grace
Your fragrance is intoxicating in our secret place
Your love is extravagant

..No greater love have I ever known, you consider me your friend.

Capture my heart again.."

- Casting Crowns <3

(tryingtofind)Love&Rockets

            Aggie