Open Letter to Dad

Dear Dad,
I sat down today and the only person I wanted to talk with was you.  I have missed you.  Your smile, your laugh,  your jokes. Even though I am well into my 20s,  married,  with a full time job,  sometimes a girl just needs her Dad.  And no one else will do.  What would you say to me?  Every once in a while, I sit down with a piece of paper and write out 5 things I would say, to you,  just so that for a second I can pretend like we are still together.  I can pretend like I will finish my work,  jump in my car,  and pull into the driveway and there you'll be,  mowing the lawn, listening to your electric blue iPod. You'll shut off the lawn mower,  and come over to me and ask me about my day-but not before you finish singing out loud (way TOO loud)  the last verse of whatever Alan Jackson song you were just listening to.  And I'll tell you about those five things I wrote down. You'll endure five way too long winded stories as you pour yourself a glass of iced tea and you'll listen.  You'll listen and never complain. You were so good at that. Maybe that's where my love for telling a long story comes from,  because I always new that no matter what,  you would listen until I was all the way finished. Lately,  I have found myself really dwelling on what your advice for my life would be,  and I realized now that I never got a chance to thank you. To thank you for always giving me an audience, for always encouraging me but for also never allowing me to believe that I was better than anyone else. Thank you for teaching me how to appreciate people and my experiences and my background. I owe everything to you.  And I'm sorry, for never telling you that while you were here.  And I miss you. Every year,  I here people tell me that it is going to get easier but to me it is seeming like with each passing year,  it is getting harder to get you out of my head,  everywhere I look I remember a story or a conversation,  I hold onto a memory. And each year it gets harder to grasp that those memories are all I have left. 
With all the love in the world,  from me to you.  
Love,  
Your Little Girl.  💙