Here Am I All of me, take my life its all for Thee.

Wednesday, July 13th.

Yesterday I was stuck in a difficult situation. I still am. I have to explain to a girl, who is adopted that she is worth the love God has for her. While not losing the truth that we do not deserve grace. And I must tread lightly because she does not believe anyone could ever love her..How do I go about doing that?

And I might have an incident worthy of Camp director intervention. Its one of those situations you hear about in staff training but write off as one of those "never happened here" things. I desperatly want to believe this girl, but part of me..is having a hard time believing it. Guidance please?!

And on top of all of this, I have my own personal problems and struggles. I have serious attachment issues. Something I need to work on..I honestly have no idea whats going on..

Dear God,

I am in awe of you. Trying to explain you to K hard. Nearly impossible.

So much for having all the answers.

Your love is unmeasurable, why do I deserve it? I dont. So how can I convey that message to her?

How can I explain to a girl who has never ever known true love in her life,

that You love her? Especially when I dont understand.

Thank you. For everything you have so graciously given to me.

Without fail, you are here for me. Even when Im all alone.

Help me to put aside the distractions that have been clouding my vision. To live, solely for you.

This life is not my own.

Dont not let my personality get in the way of my pouring out into these children. I need your wisdom. This is not a game for me.

I miss my life back home, like alot. But I absolutly love the solidarity here, how close I feel to you.

Things with Mikey havent changed yet. But I would like to forgive him. To rebuild a broken bridge. I cannot do that without your help though, he really hurt me. But I know that you really healed me and so I pray I can be a testimony to him. I really do love him. Maybe one day, everything will be ok again.

Amen.